Today I am paying the price for the last 4 days of tending to my mother. Four days of hauling shopping a distance ten times longer than I do for myself, of repeating everything I say, and anyone else for that matter, at least three times, and having to shout at the top of my voice most of the time, of having to sit on a dining chair which is most uncomfortable because that is the best option, of waiting on her hand, foot and finger and of two three hour drives. One there, one back.
I wouldn't mind if all this was appreciated, I rather think it isn't. It is expected and because I have been too unwell recently to visit more often I am told more than once that life is difficult when you are not well.
Excuse me? I am the one who had to give up work at the age of 37 because of some illness the powers that be do not want to treat. I am the one who was bedridden for 12 months though I know I got off lightly by ME standards. I am the one who then developed Fibromyalgia and yes you guessed it, no treatment for that either, and to cap it all I get RA. A cruel joke as my sister already had it. Of course hers' is much more serious then mine, that's why we are on the same medication even though we are a continent apart, indeed her illness is so bad she manages to work a 40 hour week whilst I have not worked outside the house since 1992. The final straw is a chance remark by an acquaintance that my Mother is always much more capable when my sister visits than she ever is with me.
So today I pay. I am yawning for a pastime. I am struggling to make sense of WH's paperwork he left on my desk on Sunday morning. I have a thumping head and my vision is blurred again, not due the plaquenil, no, it's been OK for over a week now. My speech is slurred and I feel foggy. Typing this has taken an hour and constant corrections. Most of all I crave red meat and chocolate a sure sign I have overdone things. I am trying to ignore that as I must lose the weight the steroids have given me.
It takes about a week to get over these visits completely or 3 days if I do absolutely nothing meanwhile. I then have another 2 weeks before I have to do it all again.
Yesterday in The Times Alison Wolf asked if Women were the Selfish Sex.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,7-2107744,00.html
The answer from this one is a most definite no.
I wouldn't mind if all this was appreciated, I rather think it isn't. It is expected and because I have been too unwell recently to visit more often I am told more than once that life is difficult when you are not well.
Excuse me? I am the one who had to give up work at the age of 37 because of some illness the powers that be do not want to treat. I am the one who was bedridden for 12 months though I know I got off lightly by ME standards. I am the one who then developed Fibromyalgia and yes you guessed it, no treatment for that either, and to cap it all I get RA. A cruel joke as my sister already had it. Of course hers' is much more serious then mine, that's why we are on the same medication even though we are a continent apart, indeed her illness is so bad she manages to work a 40 hour week whilst I have not worked outside the house since 1992. The final straw is a chance remark by an acquaintance that my Mother is always much more capable when my sister visits than she ever is with me.
So today I pay. I am yawning for a pastime. I am struggling to make sense of WH's paperwork he left on my desk on Sunday morning. I have a thumping head and my vision is blurred again, not due the plaquenil, no, it's been OK for over a week now. My speech is slurred and I feel foggy. Typing this has taken an hour and constant corrections. Most of all I crave red meat and chocolate a sure sign I have overdone things. I am trying to ignore that as I must lose the weight the steroids have given me.
It takes about a week to get over these visits completely or 3 days if I do absolutely nothing meanwhile. I then have another 2 weeks before I have to do it all again.
Yesterday in The Times Alison Wolf asked if Women were the Selfish Sex.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,7-2107744,00.html
The answer from this one is a most definite no.
2 comments:
You cannot keep overdoing things like this. There must be a way somehow to get round this. I don't want you ending up bedridden again.
Vicki x
I do say no sometimes...honest!!
I have not been since Christmas, I think that is why I had forgotten how draining it is.
There is NO WAY I will overdo to the extent of being bedridden.
Post a Comment